F.U.D–Fear, Uncertainty and Disappointment

July 17th, 2009

July 17, 2009 — A long time ago, (I shudder to think how long) an acquaintance of mine was having a bad week. We weren’t particularly close, at one point we’d been peers and competitors. She’d been on the bubble for a couple of seasons, trying to make the U.S. Team.  It wasn’t easy for her. The competition was tough and she was pretty much on her own—working odd jobs in the offseason, sleeping on people’s couches, chatting up team coaches, looking for sponsorships.

Suddenly, she burst into tears, “I’m thinking I’m never going to make it. I’m wondering if I should just quit?”

I was caught off guard, and had to think over what she’d just said. I’d retired just the season prior. One of the hardest decisions of my adult life, . . .still. I had come to the point in my career when I needed to enter big money competitions in order to progress, as a legit athlete and marketable figure. I was a long, long shot. It would take luck as well as hard work if I was going to make any sort of mark beyond regional acclaim. The problem was, I simply didn’t have the funds. I managed to hold back the tears while I called my equipment sponsor. I thanked him for supporting me and told him to give away my slot. I hung up the phone, and sobbed.

I struggled to come up with something positive to say,”Hey. I’m sorry you’re having such a tough time. Um, geez, . . I can’t really tell you what to do.”

I mean, what could I tell her? We knew the odds. And I should point out, her talent exceeded my own by light years. I had no illusions about that reality. I was never good enough to be in her position. Perhaps even, it was still too fresh for me to be philosophical about my own loss. I’m sad to say I don’t remember being much help.

As time went on and I spent more time away from the field than on it, I came to find the words I’d been at a loss to provide in that crossroads moment. A message tempered by experience—mine, hers and dozens of young athletes over the years—and for me, a rather simple one.

Don’t ever quit because you’re afraid of failing. As much as it hurts to be told you’re not good enough, it’s nothing compared to the pain of wondering whether you might have been…Your friend in baseball.

Entry Filed under: Game of Life